Cledus T. Judd – Coronary Life

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Cledus T. Judd – Coronary Life Lyrics

Cledus at the kitchen table
Short of breath, legally disabled
Wife walks in, she’s so surprised
Can’t believe i’m still alive
I say i’m hungry for biscuits and gravy
That patty melt that you always made me
But i can’t eat that anymore

They say grease kills, tastes good to me
Day in, day out, it’s all i eat
My third bypass, unclogged the valves
Just to clog them again
Never felt worse, a constant thirst
Lordy how my left arm hurts
I blame my job, i blame my wife
For this coronary life

Cledus on the er table
Vital signs ain’t too stable
“hey, doc, i’m proud of you
I didn’t think that i’d pull through”
Later in intensive care
I had the nurses laughing there
So thankful blue cross will pay

For the bills, my ivs
Four thousand dollar, ekgs
That’s the last time i need
Angioplasty
It’s off i go to tye-bo
To improve my cardio
It’s about time i said goodbye
To my coronary life

Sweat’s pouring off me at the health spa
The stairmaster’s wore me out again
You know i can’t believe how much i miss
The way i used to live

I’d eat red meat, pickled pigs’ feet
Always craving something sweet
My food was fast but that’s the past
I can’t eat fat again
Aerobicize, reduced my thighs
No more german chocolate pie
I miss my fudge, i miss my fries
And my coronary life